Wanted: A 'Vinproof' waffle iron

My wife went shopping for a waffle iron the other day.

Found one she liked and has a coupon for, too.

"Is it waterproof?" I asked.

"You mean, is it 'Vinproof?'" Sherri said, semi-kiddingly.

OK, she got me.

In the 13 months we've been married, I have inadvertently trashed some things.

Did so before we got hitched, as a matter of fact.

There was the time I was on the cellphone, switched hands and dropped it into her pool.

Stupidly, I stared at the sinking phone in disbelief as Sherri jumped into the water to retrieve it.

Scratch that cellphone.

Then there was the episode with her parents' mailbox which I decapitated with my pickup truck's passenger side mirror.

You can imagine what it looked like when I walked into their living room, carrying the mailbox under my arm.

My in-laws do have a sense of humor, thankfully.

The waffle iron?

Not as funny.

I made waffles one Sunday morning, ladled a little too much batter onto the griddle and it ran all over the place when I closed it.

After breakfast, I decided to clean it ... in our kitchen sink.

"You are not doing what I think you're doing!" she said, catching me putting the waffle iron under running water to get all the goop out of it.

"It's waterproof, isn't it?" I asked.

Sherri told me it wasn't and she wasn't about to risk being electocuted the next time finding out, either.

I had an idea.

Hoping to dry it out good, I propped it open on our pool deck, figuring a few days in the sun would do the trick.

Then we got that tremendous downpour the middle of last week --- with the waffle iron still out there.

It went out with the rest of the garbage Monday morning.